The last part of the community training I mentioned earlier talked about holding space. What holding space was and how important it is. We discussed an article written by Heather Plett.* Plett defines holding space as “us willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. The story narrated the writer’s experience with the death of her mother and how crucial the hospice nurse was to her family. The hospice nurse held space for them in this time of need. She explained what can and will happen to their mother, what they should prepare for, but most of all gave them time and space to process their emotions. She didn’t push one treatment over another and she always deferred to the family acknowledging their wishes. She explained how important holding space for others and for ourselves is. When we hold space for others we allow them to be, to heal, and to grow. It’s important that we hold space for ourselves when we hold space for others consistently.
Plett presented 8 tips to help you hold space for others towards the end of her article.
- Give people to trust their own intuition and wisdom
2. Give people only as much information as they can handle
3. Don’t take their power away
4. Keep your own ego out of it
5. Make them feel safe enough to fail
6. Give guidance and help with humanity and thoughtfulness
7. Create a container for complex emotions, fear, and trauma, etc.
8. Allow them to make different decisions and to have different experiences than you would
You may be asking yourself, how does this relate to Tarot? I have a question for you. How did you feel reading through the 8 tips of holding space for someone? Does someone hold space for you? Do you hold space for others? What role does Tarot have in holding space in your life? If you look at the 8 tips again, you may notice that Tarot allows readers (whether you read for others or just yourself) with the opportunity to hold space. 1) The Tarot requires you to trust your own intuition and wisdom. You pull the cards coming from energies the person gives off. I personally have the querents choose their cards. I ask them the questions we’re exploring as they choose the cards. I can pull cards for them, but I have always asked querents to pull their own cards. 2)The second tip is another one I’ve taken into practice within Tarot reading. The Tarot will only tell you as much information as you can handle. It is almost a reflection of your actual thoughts just put into cards and in story form as you flip them over. We generally consult the tarot when we need guidance in making a decision. Ex: what will the outcome be if I take this route over the other?
3) Tarot does not take your power away and nothing is set in stone. Tarot only reads your emotions and paths in real time. This is your current path. You can ask what if I take this route and it answers just that. But it never takes away the power of choice. 4) The Tarot pushes you to keep your ego out of it. The story may come out a little fuzzy if you don’t read from your heart and call on your intuition. The tarot can help boost your ego as a reader, but the more ego you may have, the less purposeful a reading will become for you and others. 5) The tarot reminds you that we are all just human and failure does not mean the last stretch. The five of cups, four of cups, tower, three of swords; they represent us and our emotions. They reflect a bit of failure, hurt, mistrust. But the lesson is to pull yourself out of the rut. We shouldn’t dwell on what we don’t have. We must focus on what we do have. If you don’t believe in number six, I wonder why you are interested in Tarot at all. 6 ) Gives guidance and helps with humanity and thoughtfulness. The Tarot uses the 78 cards to help guide you. It reflects your emotions and thought process out on cards. Tarot tells you a story and lets you know where you’re headed when you take your current path. Tip seven is similar in connection to the Tarot as number six. 7) Create a container for complex emotions, fear, and trauma, etc. The Tarot reflects our complex emotions, fear, and even our traumas. We see this through the court cards and the role those personalities play in our lives. The Hierophant, Hermit, Queen of swords, and The Emperor can all hold messages of emotions, fear, and trauma. The queen of swords can be cold. The Emperor can exert authority in a positive or negative way.
The last tip for holding space sums up the Tarot as a tool in people’s lives. 8) Allow them to make different decisions and to have different experiences than you would. The Tarot is just one piece in the puzzle of life. Most people will go through their life without ever having a tarot reading. But the Tarot does reminds us that we have the option to listen to the advice it gives us or not. We may have all the answers, but it’s what we do with the information that that will be more important.
Tarot holds space for us. It gives us information, tells us most of our options, and lets us decide what we should do and how we should do it. It’s like a great peer mentor or annoying older sibling that knows better than us sometimes. But it must also learn to step back from what it thinks it knows and open up to what you as a reader and querent already know. This may be the reason I pulled away from it back in 2014. The people that I went to weren’t very helpful and I sought refuge in the Tarot then. I had to give the cards a break and find my way back home afterwards.
I am glad Tarot holds space for us. I am honored when people let me hold space for them through Tarot. I will continue to use Tarot as a platform to hold space for others. It is part of my 2018 intention to bring in more positive light into this world.
Sharing Love and Positivity most of always,